It’s perfectly normal to feel nervous or anxious but for some people it reaches a debilitating level which ruins their quality of life. So if this is you, what can you do about it?
To begin with keep a journal and record what makes you anxious, include thoughts and feelings at the time of the attack. Often identifying triggers can help reduce their control.
Try to counteract negative fears with positive ideas. Such as I am frightened to join a new group- I’m interested in this club and I’ll meet other people with the same interests as me.
Allow yourself to accept that nothing in life is perfect. Your best is good enough.
Try to find humour in situations that make you uncomfortable. Spotting the ridiculous can lighten any day.
Distract yourself with music or exercise.
Avoid sugar , alcohol and caffeine.
Get plenty of sleep.
Try to challenge yourself a little to do something that is outside your comfort zone. Until you forget you have a comfort zone.
Look inside yourself and be strong. You are a warrior and this is a battle you can win.
Music can touch parts of us that nothing else can reach. In the same way as poetry and literature, lyrics can shape ideas and form integral parts of our self identity.
I believe we all have a soundtrack for our lives that expresses how we approach life and its challenges. The songs we pick say alot about our inner self and our hopes and dreams.
I’ve found myself resonating with many songs during my life but these are a few of the most influential lyrics for me.
The first three come from my favorite band Bon Jovi and sum up my attitude to life and its challenges.
Better stand tall when they’re calling you out. Don’t bend, don’t break, baby, don’t back down. It’s my life and its now or never. (It’s my life)
I’m gonna live my life shining like a diamond, rolling like a dice, standing on the edge I teach the wind how to fly and when the world gets in my face, I say have a nice day. (Have a nice day)
When your world’s crashing down like you’ve lost every round, stand your ground and ring the bells of Freedom. (Bells of Freedom)
The last is important to me because it reminds me of the values my mother taught me and it expresses the love and confidence I wanted to pass on to my own children.
When I feel weak and unpretty I know I’m beautiful and strong because I see myself like my mother does. ( like my mother does by Lauren Alaina)
Why not have a look at your own soundtrack and see what it says about who you are. You may be surprised to discover your braver and stronger than you think.
I’ve had a number of people comment that I don’t write as though I have a degree. I have in fact a degree in psychology and studied English literature at
degree level but I don’t write like a graduate for a very simple reason, its not the sum total of who I am. It’s just one small facet of me. I’m a Yorkshire girl born and bred and im proud of my accent.
I’m a wife, a mother and step mother to a group of fantastic individuals and I’m a Nana to ten amazing children that I love with all my heart.
I’m also a friend, a horse rider, an animal lover, a writer, and a personal development coach.
I love to read, to sing, dance, walk, paint and ride. I’m a loyal friend and a nasty enemy. I’m quick to laugh and have a blazing temper. I’m enthusiastic, loud and opinionated. All those things along with many more are a part of me.
Writing for me is a form of self expression. I want to connect with people and have them know that my thoughts are mine, straight from the heart. Not hide behind complex sentences and a stale crusty academic style.
So love me or hate me, I’m the girl from Yorkshire who wants to help make the world a better place. In my own style, using my own voice.
I am without a doubt an ultra confident individual but like everyone else I’m subjected to the daily pressures to conform. The newspapers, television and magazines are filled with images of how we should look, what we should think and how to act, and all that is surpassed by the expectations of friends and family and our own communities.
I realised a long time ago that it’s OK to be me. It’s all very well to try and live up to the expectations of others but at the end of the day the only persons opinion that really matters is your own.
You’re the person who has to look at yourself in the mirror everyday. You’re the person who has to live with the things that you say and the decisions you make. You’re also the only person who has to live with the consequences.
So it’s time to take a stand. Never mind the super slim models and celebrities, with the glossy hair and plastic surgery altered faces and bodies, do you like how you look?
Do you like the person you are and the way you live?
If the answer is yes, hold yourself proud and let the critics go their own way. It’s your life, be free and live it.